For a while now I have wanted to write a review of something and as The Hunger Games seems to be the internets new addiction (after cats and gynecology), I figured I would add my own opinions to the mix. To ensure this is done in a fair and unbiased way, I am writing this review before I see the movie (or read the book or buy the lunch box), as I feel doing so would directly influence my judgement of it.

To start with the movie clearly has nothing to do with Sherlock Holmes, which I found to be an odd and alienating decision on the part of the writers. Instead the plot focuses mainly on a group of teenagers sitting, occasionally walking, in wood which could very well be revealed as a forest later sequels. I personally find this a welcome continuation of pace for the whole teenagers standing around in woodland genre, however the death-sport sub-plot was somewhat distracting and I could not help but feel the film would have benefited from its removal. Fortunately the director wisely decided to downplay this entire aspect by removing all the death scenes/references and replaced them with a CGI talking Ford Fiesta in a similar way to Pixars later rewrite of Cars 2: Murder Wheels.

The cast do a brilliant job of bringing the story of murder and trees to life, the most notable of which is a CGI talking Micheal Keaton; who can been seen in the films trailer playing that mother from Brazil, ruler of District 12 (*Insert District 9 alien joke*) and commander of an army of Space Balls. The hawk who stars in the logo however is less impressive, apparently unable to decide if its head is looking straight ahead in profile, or forward in a sort of down and right-a-bit angle. Those who will also be unimpressed are the fans of the book, to which this film is entirely unrelated after birzarry substituting text for moving pictures as a means of conveying the plot.

Overall I would highly recommend this film, although I must point out the cinema will charge extra for bringing in outside Battle Royale jokes.

I have no idea what point this image was made to represent, but I’m sure its relevant to whatever.

For a more ‘traditional’ less ‘dangerously radical thinker’ (as my food teacher would describe) type review, stay tuned until after Tuesday when I see The Hunger Games for-reals.